Nevergirl’s

So, my sister passed the Nursing Boards recently, and now she’s back in school for language competency courses that require her to understand American English, Cockney, Irish, Aussie-speak, and just maybe Klingon, too. Since I have a relatively decent background at being interviewer (I did hiring and firing at the old think tank; I do the same for the present job), she figured I’d be the best person to practice her interview-answering skills on. Cut to an hour after when I’ve exhausted what little I know of interview questions and have decided to just go wing it:

“If you could be a fruit, what would you be?”

My sister gives me an incredulous look. I try to be helpful and say, “At this point, you should say you want to be a grape.”

“Because it’s cute?”

“Because it’s an antioxidant, you numbskull, and thus, useful to the rest of humanity.”

“Do you really want to be a grape?”

I thought about it for a bit. Be small, round, and purple? Not such a good idea, I decided, and so I dropped a more language-related question.

“Hoe koop ek goudstawe?”

“What does that even mean?”

“How do I buy gold bars?” I pronounce self-importantly, only to be whacked soundly in the head by a plump pillow.

My sister doesn’t appreciate what I do; I really think this. Hey, she needs to be linguistically proficient, and the last time I checked, Afrikaans was still considered a language, not gibberish. If she doesn’t make the cut, that won’t be because I failed to help, I tell you.

Here we are getting our lafang on. Photo unrelated to the post, of course.

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